Bom Gia Brazil! Tucans, anteaters, FRUIT, adventures and a whole lot of Waterfalls

It’s all very well thinking when you fly across the world for half a week to find some friends that they would give you a day to relax and reset your life but maybe not when you fly to visit Juanita. Juanita and Paul had been in Brazil for 5 months before I arrived and had been volunteering with some guys involved

in permaculture. I arrived at their house in Campo Grande and was greeted by the HUGEST avocados I have ever seen, this white grainy pancake thing, honey, yummy coffee and a volley of Brazilian men. The rain was pouring down all around us and the trees were so tropical looking, even in the little verandah where they lived. I was still confused and tired when Juanita told me to pack a bag for a few days because we were off to visit the home of their friend and pseudo boss, Wagner, a few hours away. So after spending 56 hours in transit, I got into a car with next to zero legroom, myself, Paulie, Wagner and Juanita sharing the backseat and Wagner’s cousin Flavio and Flavio’s father, Antonio in the front.

 

Three hours later we had traveled along green green fields and amazing trees and little towns, I had played ukulele and learned as much Portuguese that I think is possible in a day, we had sang songs and talked about everything and tried to sleep yet it was way too uncomfortable and after all that, we were only half way. One must remember that a few hours, or 3 hours in Brazilian speak can mean anywhere between 6 hours and perhaps three days depending on the context. Yet finally, after a long jolty dirt road we arrived at the house of Flavio’s father. And I got re-introduced to my now most feared enemy- the mosquito. 

Now it is something not really discussed when people go wild about going to the Amazon or any other amazing tropical place and I don’t know why more emphasis isn’t placed upon it. But the fact is, that you can be in the most incredible spectacular mind-blowing places in your life but if there are mosquitoes trying to bite you in droves, it is simply not fun. I spent my days at Flavio’s father’s house covered in clothes and when I forgot and wore short shorts, covered in mosquitoes. They bit me everywhere and at night the mosquito song woke me and up and kept me up in terror. They also didn’t leave cute little South African size bites but big welts all along my legs and back and I itched and scratched until they bled, trying not to be miserable about it. There was only 3 modes from then on that I liked being in- in Flavio’s car with the windows open blowing them away, hiding under water or with a fan upon my body. 

Regardless, Flavio’s father’s property was on the edge of the Pontanel which is one of the most bio-diverse areas in all of Brazil. It is a series of wetlands which brings incredible birds and incredible wildlife and a wonderful lack of people. There is one house in about 50 000 hectares so and to get in or out of the Pontanel you have  to go on  dirt roads through people’s farms. If you want to escape all manor of people, it’s the place to go. I didn’t go there but Juanita and Paulie had to fly there in November there because during the wet season one cannot get there at all.  It starts in the West of Brazil and extends into Paraguay. From Falvio's father's house we could walk up to the edge of the Pontanel on the mountain and look upon it, huge wetalnds stretching as far as the eye can see.

But Oh Brazil! The sky was so big, I kept on looking at it and wondering how a sky can be so big! The sunsets, the sunrises all blew me away (only when I was wearing full body clothing.) Flavio and Wagner themselves blew me away in their knowledge of fruits and vegetables and I constantly wondered what I had done with my life, I didn’t even know how to machete or Fakong a coconut!  Wagner himself was a 33 year old boy. His face portrayed so much youthfulness and his sweet loving nature was open like a child. As was his skill at climbing trees. Before I met him, I thought I had some sort of prowess at tree climbing yet Wagner leaps, jumps and crawls up trees without a smidgeon of fea I saw him put a raw egg and egg shell into a cup and start eating it. I said “Wagner, is that an egg?” he smiled “si si” and I said “with eggshell?” and I started to explain that egg shell was the box of the egg and he said “Si SI!” I got a second opinion and after it had all been explained, his smiling “Si SI’s” turned into a horrified “No Mary, No!”. 

r. He used to live in the Amazon and was doing some sort of protest art against people who were destroying it and he learned to climb trees like a monkey (what else does one do in the Amazon?) Anyway Wagner is obsessed with seeds and growing things and so often he would find a random tree and be up it in a second taking all the fruit, or we would be under a tree collecting all the seeds (another tedious, mosquito and huge ant filled task). He didn’t speak English, or at least he knew a few words, and sometimes when you asked him questions he would simply pretend he understood and smile and nod saying “Si Si”. Once I thought

Flavio on the other hand could speak English quite well and proved to be a wonderful  Portuguese teacher. He had traveled some and was the only Brazilian I met in my time there that had any concept of time. Now means now (or at least in the next 30 minutes) to Flavio and I wonder how he has survived in the country so far. Punctual yet with patience he wanted to show us every adventure he could in the time we were there. His father, Antonio was a seventh Day Adventist Missionary and he was very excited that we had 4 continents together in this strange place at the edge of the earth which he mentioned in all his prayers. And indeed it was true, myself from Africa, Juanita from Oceania, Paulie from Europe and them from South America. He decided Juanita and I were crazy and most of the time when he wasn’t playing his religious music or having religious discussions, or showing us his Seventh Day Adventist books from our specific continent with whoever he could, he would laugh and point at us and say “Meninas locas!” (crazy girls). 

We left Antonio and his house and Antonio some sunsets and sunrises, family visits, good food and a ridiculous amount of ukulele playing and ukulele teaching (Paul, Juanita and Wagner all were my very determined students) and went on to find a waterfall

 On the way we happened upon his uncle's car stuck in a river because I THINK they had wanted to take a picture of, i don't know, something, so they decided to go through the river and not the lovely dry bridge right beside it. They didn't seem too concerned yet were happy for our pushing and grunting them out of the river.

Onwards we went yet apparently it wasn't just any waterfall as we went along dirt roads and dirt roads and farms and amazing colours and dirt roads until we went up this dirt road to find a flooded road. Well, nothing stops Flavio and we all got out and waded for about 100 metres through mosquito infested dirty road water up to our waists when finally we realized the water wasn’t going to stop and soon we might be up to our necks and no closer to the waterfall. About turn and back the way we came to the hometown of Flavio and Wagner (Antonio stayed at his house) and we arrived for tea at some aunts and uncles and then tried to swing a supper at Wagner’s cousins house as Wagner is the king of a free lunch (No concept of time apparently but when it's time to eat, it's definitely time to show up). A free supper and a free bed with a fan (YAY) we woke up the next day and tried again for this waterfall.  We went through different farms and visited the cousins farms and then found ourselves at the side of a rushing river. After a run a kilometer through more mosquitoes we were greeted by the rushingest of rivers. It looked like a crossing could only end in bodies being speared upon logs floating around the river yet i was not deterred and i jumped in the water and held fiercely  onto a tree to escape the mosquitoes. there was no way I was not going to cross the river thinking maybe there would be less mosquitoes on the other side. 

Everyone was unsure yet if anyone could swim across and not die, but Wagner seemed the most likely to survive, so we told him to go first. He swam across rapidly and ended up a bunch downstream but safely on the other side Flavio and I launched forth next, and made it some way further down the river. Juanita and Paulie looked unsure on the other side and I tried to sign that it was easy with hand signals over rushing water sounds but I think the mosquitoes biting them was enough to want to cross the river. The other side we scrambled up some rocks and beheld the most brilliant of waterfalls I have ever been privy to. It was gigantic and with the rainy season it had so much power falling upon water upon water. We swam gloriously and used the heaviness of the waterfall upon our back to stop the itching of the mosquitoes.

After finally getting to our waterfall and somehow safely back down the mosquito path and into the car we were covered in welts but not too upset. We continued our mission to Bonito which is of course Bonito (beautiful). A place of clear water and colourful fish, I was sadly there at the wrong time because the rain had made the water muddy and I couldn't see any fish. We did find a place to sneak into that was free and body surfed the rapids and barely missed falling down another waterfall by sneakily going into a side current.

We stayed there at friend Marcello’s house who was a mad fish photographer and showed me millions of pictures of crazy looking fish while we lay in his hammock and listened to delightful Brazilian music. 

It was time to return to Campo Grande after missioning far and wide in places I didn’t even know I was in. Finally half asleep Wagner yelled and there it was, a GIANT anteater ambling across the field! Wha

GIANT 

ANTEATER!!!

t a mad animal, so strange and peculiar, so big with a ridiculous tail and a ridiculous snout. YAY Brazil. The sunset was beautifully set upon us as we headed home, giant macaws and Tucans were flying home and we stopped at a market to eat deep-fried cheese in deep-fried pastry and Flavio bought us a blow up dinosaur to bring further on our travels which we named appropriately, Flavio. Back in Campo Grande with a bed and a fan, a kitchen and space for my legs to stretch... it was time to sleep.

Embarking towards Brazil- Tears and relief in the world of transit

Cape Town was doing what Cape Town does best the day before I was to leave for Brazil-  raining in all its full glory. I washed my clothes and when I woke up on Tuesday morning I was greeted with all my clothes clean yet sopping. This is something normally I could reason out quite effectively but a travel-across-the-world day where I don’t know what is going to happen on the other end is not a day when I am at my full capabilities. So soon I was running across the city with tears streaming down my face somehow feeling like the entire world is falling down my head because of a pile of wet clothes. At the Laundromat there was a clear sign “Driers can only be used if you wash” yes obviously I decided to be illiterate and put my clothes in anyway. The laundry lady was completely on it though, caught me and tried to shove me out. Apparently I couldn’t pay her any amount of money to let me dry, I couldn’t even start a fake wash cycle. Luckily my tears were only barely below the surface of my face and I graciously let them loose. The cleaning lady looked at me with some sort of contemptuous pity and said “Fine, dry your clothes”. 

I continued my day with more emotional packing and my parents picked me up early and we made our way to the airport. At the check-in desk the man asked “Where’s your return itinerary?’ and I said “what?” and he said, “Brazil won’t let you in if you don’t have it.” I pleaded but there was no budging, I wasn’t to be let on without some sort of proof I was leaving the Brazil at some point. In a stressful movement my parents and I rushed to Ocean Basket for some computer searching for some sort of bus or plane that would remove me from Brazil for the sake of passport control. Well I found a bus that would take me to Paraguay at a nice price but apparently one couldn’t book it online. All the flights were upward of 500 dollars and it all seemed hopeless till my father suggested a travel agent and an unpaid itinerary. A frantic call to a travel agent booked me a flight but when we looked at the emailed itinerary it went from Buenos Aires and not from any city in Brazil. Another stressed phone call later she had sent us a nice unpaid itinerary from Rio to Paraguay. I stressfully showed this itinerary to the check-in man, praying he would not see that top right hand corner with "THIS ITINERARY IS UNPAID AND NO RESERVATION HAS BEEN MADE". My heart stopped a beat yet finally he grunted and gave me my boarding passes.

  

Doha city lights

The plane was 2 hours late, of course, after all that stressing and a thunder storm in Johannesburg didn’t help matters yet 12 hours later we are about to land in Qatar. The loud speaker was on and reported the time, “it is now 8.30am local time in Doha”. I looked at my boarding pass going to Sao Paulo from Doha and the boarding time was 7.40am. Well, there was nothing I could do, so I refused to think about it. Out of the plane and into the airport almost all of us on the South African flight were told we had missed our connecting flights- flights to Belgium, Bangkok, Istanbul and Sao Paulo. Oh dear. A day late was not a problem but I had bought a domestic flight in Brazil for that evening which was impossible to get onto. AH! So in the boiling desert heat we shuttled off to a 5 star hotel near the airport. Fancy people greeted us and I went into the dining room where they served any kind of breakfast one could ever want then ascended to my hotel room which was more than double the size of my apartment in Korea complete with couches to invite friends over and 2 beds (I slept in both just coz I could). 

 

Well then, business. I needed to change my domestic flight. I tried to find a number for the company online, everything was all in Portuguese but I got somewhere somehow. S

kype didn’t like phoning 1- 800 numbers so, my head throbbing with all the madness, I went to the main desk and asked them to use their phone. The number didn’t work and I was near bursting into tears until everyone at the front desk gave me a caring c
hat about how I had to go eat and I would feel better. I did feel better, like a new person better, and finally the lady found a number that worked. Then I called, waited on line for about 20 minutes for an English speaker, changed my flight with a fine of 170 dollars (the flight only cost 100) and had to pay another 40 euros for the international calling charges.

With most of the stress out of the way (besides the fear of not being allowed into Brazil) it was time to see the world. A Belgium girl I had mt at the airport and I decided to adventure around. There’s probably a reason why not many people dream of visiting the Middle East. I cannot speak for everything of course but Doha was a dusty, dry and fake city. We walked along streets of nothing yet hard desert and then suddenly there was a patch of green grass that you knew took tons of water to keep healthy. Fake palm trees lined their water area and amazing architecture surrounded us. It was if, because they did not have their own natural beauty, architecture would have to do. It was so hot at 5 o clock we found refuge in a gigantic mall full of Islamic fashion. We found the water on our way back and shared our life stories. Stuck in Doha, she going to Belgium, me to Brazil we found solace in the fake palm trees and the calm water, some men gave us some nuts and some English speakers helped us find a taxi home. 

A sleep and a 5 am wake up found me on shuttle back to the airport. The plane was late, of course (why it couldn’t have been late the day before I don’t know) but then onto Brazil it was. The flight was long. Oh so long. Longer than long. A Filipino lady fainted and they were calling all the doctors on board as she needed medical attention. An Argentinian and a Brazilian were talking about the lady and the Argentinian said he knew another Filipino who fainted once and he concluded that all Filipinos like fainting. Oh dear. People. Anyway we finally arrived in Sao Paulo and after many babies crying and a buzz of discomfort all around. I got into the customs queue with my heart beating fast still frightened I was not to be let into Brazil with my unpaid for itinerary. I went to the counter trying to look as nice and nonthreatening as possible. Yet, after 44 hours of worrying the lady barely looked at me, grumpily stamped my passport and I was in BRAZIL!

Then onto my next flight where I had to rush to but yet again the boarding time came and passed and I waited for the plane. Not understanding anything I just hoped I didn’t somehow miss the flight. Finally everyone was called to the desk and a huge group of people began shouting in Portuguese. I found an English speaking man and he told me the flight was cancelled. Yet there was hope! My flight to Campo Grande had a layover in Rio and perhaps I would get a direct flight instead now. So after some more waiting around they had a translator phone me and told me that no, the plane would be going tomorrow. I pictured sleeping in the airport and hungry because I didn't have any money and after the long mission I had made I began to cry. The airport people didn’t know what to do with me so instead they took me to the restaurant and bought me some deep fried roll thing filled with cheese and a coke. The translator called again and explained that in fact I was not to sleep at the airport and was to go to a hotel. This cheered me up some and the 4 other people how were also going to Campo Grande went together. There was an old guy who was traveling with literally nothing. Just in his jeans and his shirt, no bag, no nothing. There was a beautiful Brazilian girl who showed me pictures of her modeling wedding dresses and pictures of her child yet I finally found out that somehow she wasn’t a model she was an oral hygienist and she just likes taking photos. Her dentist boss was traveling with her and learning English and I encouraged him to practice a little with me. After some shyness we started talking slowly and then the last person was a music lecturer. She travels to all the small towns all over Brazil and learns their traditional songs and music and teaches what she learns to students. She was a very powerful woman with a husky voice and somehow could speak English so well and I wished we were in a place where I could hear her sing.

On to the hotel and a sleep and a wake up and a shuttle and a wander around the airport and finally I was on a plane and asleep and in Campo Grande. I was finally there and I walked through the gates to see… No Juanita. Oh dear after all my flight changes something had gone wrong and I thought I  was an hour late and had been abandoned. I walked around the tiny airport

depressedly and when I came back to arrivals FINALLY there she was dressed in mad paint and her boyfriend Paulie had dressed as a redneck cow boy with handle bar mustache and all. I wish I had had more time to appreciate the awesomeness of their appearances but I was so tired I could only smile and stop myself from crying yet again. I was here finally and it was time to be with friends... and swear off aeroplanes for the rest of my life.